Montreal, Nov. 1st. 2014
I suppose by now you already know that i got married this past summer. If you haven’t, well yes i married my prince charming in August in a catholic ceremony followed by a very romantic reception in a castle called Laxenburg outside of Vienna.
Weeks after i got married i found a Vietnamese news article about my wedding with the following headline: Singer Bao Han got married at age 41!!!
I couldn’t help but laughing cause what’s clearly emphasized here is the number 41. I suppose the fact that Bao Han got married wasn’t great news enough but the fact that she would STILL do it at the unsexy age of 41 would catch readers ‘ eyes immediately. I realized that that headline made its rounds virtually pretty fast cause i would find it on several other websites as well.
There is no reason why i should explain myself and why it took me “so long” to get married because i am a firm believer that one should only get married whenever it feels right for both sides. However since it has obviously become a topic (especially among my 30 and up single female fans) i would like to tell you a lil bit about my previous relationships and why i never ended being married to any of my Ex boyfriends. The reason is pretty simple: i used to date younger men and none of them were actually ready for a marriage. As a little girl i had already dreamed of walking down the aisle by the age of 20. Once i reached 30 i began to question my past relationships because the more i tried to bring up the Family planning issue, the more i got shut down immediately...one by one . by the age of 38 i knew that my time was running out and that i had to be clearer and more frank in what i expected from my partner as well as from our relationship. When you reach a certain age time goes by so much faster and as a woman you should be able to let the partner know what your expectations are. I used to joke with my friends about how i think that a date between two people should be only about exchanging their “resumes”. Each side should go home, read the other person’s resume which includes expectations, dreams, goals etc and if you like what you’re reading, then call your potential partner and meet him/her for a second, the actual date. Wouldn’t we all save so much time by just making a few things clear and addressing certain issues right from the very beginning instead of finding out certain things later on in a relationship?
And yet ,in the end women tend to wait around because they hope and want to believe that their partner will change . in most cases they don’t.
After my last relationship i stopped thinking about marriage but i never stopped dreaming of children and a little family. Even though i am confronted with health issues that most likely wont’ allow me to carry my own children i still believe that i will have children, one or another way. The most important part is that i found somebody who is on the same page with me, who doesn’t like wasting his time either. Tee also knows what he wants in life and most importantly, he never loses fun in what he is doing.
So if you ask me what getting married at 41 truly means to me? It means that never for once had i given up on love. It means that life has never stopped being fun. It means that the more people point out my age and remind me that i am not so young anymore, the more i laugh about it and tell them this:
“when i look in the mirror i see a woman who is not ashamed of telling people her age but looks pretty hot for 41, who enjoys her life to the fullest, who loves fashion but doesn’t like spending a fortune on it. Someone who can admit her vulnerability as a woman but feels her strength from within like a man. I see a woman who is dealing with a health condition that surely scares her but wont defeat her, someone who likes getting all dolled up but for nobody else than for herself.”
And all these things are exactly what i would like to share with you on this website: my view on life as a middle age Asian woman, my passion for fashion that won’t cost you a fortune, my thoughts on current topics, my love for make up and other beauty related topics, my life with Parkinsons disease and how i still manage to enjoy life to the fullest.
Thank you all for inspiring and motivating me to do this and i hope that there is a lil bit of something for everyone in here.